Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Date With a Zombie

There are two types of people in this world—those who have a zombie preparedness plan and zombie food. I fall into the former category. I think I spend more time considering zombie plans for wherever I go than I do planning for actual emergencies. I'll tell you right now I'm not going anywhere during the great zombiepocalypse. I plan on staying right at home, plinking nearby zombies with any firearms I can obtain.

One of the things I love about zombies is that they're people, but they're also blight. Killing them is an issue of survival. For every zombie you let survive, they greater the likelihood of more people being converted. Furthermore they're being dead absolves one from murder as you can't kill what is legally dead. As such I have no qualms about massacring zombies left and right, be they family, lovers, or friends. It's like a coming out party for the little sociopath inside of me.

But what if it were possible to reverse the condition? Readers already know I don't believe that is possible as I only believe in classic zombies, but we'll go ahead and ponder this hypothetical question. Would it make a difference? No. Not to me at least. As I stated before, it's a matter of survival. If there were some blanket cure that the government could rain from the skies, then fine. But while FEMA and the military are busy dragging they're asses, I'll be doing my best to reduce the zombie population to nil.

So I already have plans for the zombiepocalypse. I'm almost certain they're a little different from your plans, oh reader. Mine might not be the best plan, but between us, who do you think is going to be having more fun?

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