1. IBC Cream Soda
2. Perrier Lime
3. Arnold Palmer
4. plain iced tea
5. Mr. & Mrs. T's Bloody Mary Mix
6. fruit punch
7. Earl Grey tea
8. Cherry Coca Cola
9. water
10. Dr. Pepper
Saturday, June 5, 2010
Umami Burger on La Brea
After a day of running errands around town, I wanted to eat something delicious, so we ended up at Umami Burger. Umami Burger is a chain of trendy, upscale, gourmet burger restaurants, the type of place where the burger and nothing else comes on a pristine white plate. There are currently four locations, but we went to the one on La Brea.
The restaurant itself is very small, with perhaps 30 seats inside, and another dozen outside. The small area makes for some intimacy, but the sheer volume of chatter almost ensures you won't have any. Oh well, that's not why I went there.
The menu consists solely of burgers and sides, with about a half dozen variations of the beefy offerings. Each burger variation has been carefully crafted with a precise mix of complimentary flavors. Today I ordered their signature burger, the Umami burger. It boasts six different sources of umami, that fifth flavor also known as savory that derives from glutamic acid. I can't name all the ingredients that contributed to the umami, but I do know that they were all good.
After ordering, the burger came fairly quickly. My first impression was that it was rather modest and plain—a lone, single burger sitting in the middle of an expansive rectangular plate. But that tiny burger packed a wallop of flavor.
Now when judging a burger, you really have to discuss the patty, as, after all, a hamburger wouldn't be a hamburger without the patty. Even if the bun, all the toppings, and the sauces are good, it means very little without the right burger patty. I've had quite a few good burgers, but this one is instantly in my top two (sorry, MOS Burger is still my number one), and it's all because of the patty.
I got a little glimpse into the kitchen, so I could see that they grind their own meat, if only I knew what cuts. Their burger patty is like a work of art. It's devoid of gristle, yet still maintains a wonderfully varied texture without the usual annoyances. The patty is loosely packed and as I ordered mine rare (medium rare is their standard, so speak up if you like otherwise), if the meat weren't lean it would be a goobly mess. Despite what must be a lack of inherent fat, the burger tastes wonderfully rich, with the most beautiful caramelization on the outside. It was like eating the best prime rib, but in burger form.
Topping the burger was their Umami ketchup, grilled onions, Parmesan frico, sauteed shiitake mushroom, and roasted tomato. Everything came served on a lightly toasted brioche bun. Thinking about it, it was all quite frou-frou, but after having eaten it, I don't even care. This is not the type of burger you scarf down—that would be an insult (and a waste of your $10). No, you have to take each bite and chew it lovingly and longingly—this is the type of burger you make love to, but only after dating it for a month and getting to know it pretty well.
I could go on and on about how I met the burger's parents, and the proposal, but I should take some time and talk about Umami Burger's onion rings. I also ordered their malt liquor tempura onion rings. They were similar in many ways to beer-batter-fried Maui onion rings, but much more refined. They were lighter in color, but no less greasy. The added touch of sea salt was also a nice surprise. They come in a short stack, but go a long way.
Lastly, to clean my palate between bites (you really wouldn't want to muddle all the wonderful flavors), I ordered a ginger ale. It would have been an Arnold Palmer but they ran out(?) of iced tea. The waiter brought me a bottle of Vavo ginger ale, which was very light and refreshing. The ginger extract gave it a sharper ginger bite, and the light cane sugar didn't make it too abundantly sweet.
I would have to say it was a near perfect experience. Why wasn't it perfect? Well, because some annoying internet blogger who will go unnamed, *cough* Perez Hilton *cough*, was sitting behind me playing "Would you rather..." with his dinner guests. He was so loud, I couldn't even eavesdrop on their answers. Luckily Andy Garcia swooped in with his three lovely daughters, and the annoying internet blogger vanished into the night. Sometimes living in Los Angeles is so weird.
Some other notes on Umami Burger:
- 5 out of 7 on my mess-o-meter, meaning your burger will fall apart and leak juices the closer you get to finishing it.
- 10 out of 10 on my burg-o-meter, meaning that I want to have kids with this burger.
- Perez Hilton: 10 out of 10 on my douche-o-meter, meaning even douches would have to douche after meeting him.
- Andy Garcia: 8 out of 10 on my cool-cat-o-log, because he was sporting an awesome Confederate beard and mustache combo. Plus his daughters were surprisingly attractive.
Umami Burger La Brea
850 S. La Brea Ave.
Los Angeles, CA 90036
(323) 931-3000
Umami Burger Hollywood
4655 Hollywood Blvd.
Hollywood, CA 90027
(323) 669-3922
Umami Urban
1520 N. Cahuenga Blvd. #7
Los Angeles, CA 90028
(323) 469-3100
Umami Santa Monica
Fred Segal
500 Broadway
Santa Monica, CA 90401
(310) 451-1300
Umami Burger Website
The restaurant itself is very small, with perhaps 30 seats inside, and another dozen outside. The small area makes for some intimacy, but the sheer volume of chatter almost ensures you won't have any. Oh well, that's not why I went there.
The menu consists solely of burgers and sides, with about a half dozen variations of the beefy offerings. Each burger variation has been carefully crafted with a precise mix of complimentary flavors. Today I ordered their signature burger, the Umami burger. It boasts six different sources of umami, that fifth flavor also known as savory that derives from glutamic acid. I can't name all the ingredients that contributed to the umami, but I do know that they were all good.
After ordering, the burger came fairly quickly. My first impression was that it was rather modest and plain—a lone, single burger sitting in the middle of an expansive rectangular plate. But that tiny burger packed a wallop of flavor.
Now when judging a burger, you really have to discuss the patty, as, after all, a hamburger wouldn't be a hamburger without the patty. Even if the bun, all the toppings, and the sauces are good, it means very little without the right burger patty. I've had quite a few good burgers, but this one is instantly in my top two (sorry, MOS Burger is still my number one), and it's all because of the patty.
I got a little glimpse into the kitchen, so I could see that they grind their own meat, if only I knew what cuts. Their burger patty is like a work of art. It's devoid of gristle, yet still maintains a wonderfully varied texture without the usual annoyances. The patty is loosely packed and as I ordered mine rare (medium rare is their standard, so speak up if you like otherwise), if the meat weren't lean it would be a goobly mess. Despite what must be a lack of inherent fat, the burger tastes wonderfully rich, with the most beautiful caramelization on the outside. It was like eating the best prime rib, but in burger form.
Topping the burger was their Umami ketchup, grilled onions, Parmesan frico, sauteed shiitake mushroom, and roasted tomato. Everything came served on a lightly toasted brioche bun. Thinking about it, it was all quite frou-frou, but after having eaten it, I don't even care. This is not the type of burger you scarf down—that would be an insult (and a waste of your $10). No, you have to take each bite and chew it lovingly and longingly—this is the type of burger you make love to, but only after dating it for a month and getting to know it pretty well.
I could go on and on about how I met the burger's parents, and the proposal, but I should take some time and talk about Umami Burger's onion rings. I also ordered their malt liquor tempura onion rings. They were similar in many ways to beer-batter-fried Maui onion rings, but much more refined. They were lighter in color, but no less greasy. The added touch of sea salt was also a nice surprise. They come in a short stack, but go a long way.
Lastly, to clean my palate between bites (you really wouldn't want to muddle all the wonderful flavors), I ordered a ginger ale. It would have been an Arnold Palmer but they ran out(?) of iced tea. The waiter brought me a bottle of Vavo ginger ale, which was very light and refreshing. The ginger extract gave it a sharper ginger bite, and the light cane sugar didn't make it too abundantly sweet.
I would have to say it was a near perfect experience. Why wasn't it perfect? Well, because some annoying internet blogger who will go unnamed, *cough* Perez Hilton *cough*, was sitting behind me playing "Would you rather..." with his dinner guests. He was so loud, I couldn't even eavesdrop on their answers. Luckily Andy Garcia swooped in with his three lovely daughters, and the annoying internet blogger vanished into the night. Sometimes living in Los Angeles is so weird.
Some other notes on Umami Burger:
- 5 out of 7 on my mess-o-meter, meaning your burger will fall apart and leak juices the closer you get to finishing it.
- 10 out of 10 on my burg-o-meter, meaning that I want to have kids with this burger.
- Perez Hilton: 10 out of 10 on my douche-o-meter, meaning even douches would have to douche after meeting him.
- Andy Garcia: 8 out of 10 on my cool-cat-o-log, because he was sporting an awesome Confederate beard and mustache combo. Plus his daughters were surprisingly attractive.
Umami Burger La Brea
850 S. La Brea Ave.
Los Angeles, CA 90036
(323) 931-3000
Umami Burger Hollywood
4655 Hollywood Blvd.
Hollywood, CA 90027
(323) 669-3922
Umami Urban
1520 N. Cahuenga Blvd. #7
Los Angeles, CA 90028
(323) 469-3100
Umami Santa Monica
Fred Segal
500 Broadway
Santa Monica, CA 90401
(310) 451-1300
Umami Burger Website
Friday, June 4, 2010
Olympic Pole Dancing
Apparently pole dancing is being considered for an Olympic event, and I for one am going to support this. Pole dancing is an incredible art form. I'm not talking about two-drink-minimum-stripper-club pole dancing, but sensual, body sculpture, classy pole dancing. However I'm a little concerned about one thing: is it only going to be female pole dancing?
Traditionally, pole dancing has been a female art form, for particular reasons which need not be explained. But if a sport is going to be introduced to the Olympics, shouldn't it be open to both genders? Which begs the question, why not male pole dancing? Before any readers leave in disgust, hear me out. While generally not as light as women, men have greater strength and therefore should be physically adept at pole dancing. Furthermore, shouldn't women (or homosexual men for that matter) also be able to enjoy watching the sport as much as men do?
If pole dancing isn't masculine enough, why not pole dance fighting? Have two poles parallel to each other with one man to each pole, and whoever knocks the other one off first wins. To make it more challenging, and artistic, the men have to complete certain moves as they fight, such as the Jamilla, aerial upright V, or the superstar. They could be graded on artistry as well as pure victory points.
I understand this event may not be for everyone. Regardless of whether or not they plan to introduce a men's pole dancing competition, I plan on supporting pole dancing for inclusion in the Olympics. That way, little girls and their parents can rest assured knowing that pole dancing doesn't necessarily mean a bleak future of tacky lingerie and tramp stamps—there's also the possibility for Olympic gold.
Here's a video of pole dancing at it's best (NSFW):
Being the best in the world got her a job in Zumanity. I guess that's good?
Traditionally, pole dancing has been a female art form, for particular reasons which need not be explained. But if a sport is going to be introduced to the Olympics, shouldn't it be open to both genders? Which begs the question, why not male pole dancing? Before any readers leave in disgust, hear me out. While generally not as light as women, men have greater strength and therefore should be physically adept at pole dancing. Furthermore, shouldn't women (or homosexual men for that matter) also be able to enjoy watching the sport as much as men do?
If pole dancing isn't masculine enough, why not pole dance fighting? Have two poles parallel to each other with one man to each pole, and whoever knocks the other one off first wins. To make it more challenging, and artistic, the men have to complete certain moves as they fight, such as the Jamilla, aerial upright V, or the superstar. They could be graded on artistry as well as pure victory points.
I understand this event may not be for everyone. Regardless of whether or not they plan to introduce a men's pole dancing competition, I plan on supporting pole dancing for inclusion in the Olympics. That way, little girls and their parents can rest assured knowing that pole dancing doesn't necessarily mean a bleak future of tacky lingerie and tramp stamps—there's also the possibility for Olympic gold.
Here's a video of pole dancing at it's best (NSFW):
Being the best in the world got her a job in Zumanity. I guess that's good?
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
Yokai of the Week - Hiatus
Due to unforeseeable circumstances, yokai of the week is currently on vacation. Hopefully it'll be up and running again in the next week or two.
Sunday, May 30, 2010
JR Bistro in Chinatown
Since Sister C was out for the night, the plan was to eat Chinese at Phoenix Inn. But when we got there, it was closed for renovations until June 2. This left us in a quandary as to where to eat, and eventually we decided upon JR Bistro beneath Ocean Seafood.
From all appearances, the interior of JR Bistro resembles a Hong Kong cafe, with a couple of big screen TVs on the walls. However the cuisine is typical of what you would find in most Chinatown restaurants. It took a while for the wait staff to take our order, and they looked undermanned but it could have been because it was a Sunday evening.
We ordered five dishes: mu shu pork, shrimp with glazed walnuts, calamari with garlic spicy salt, shredded pork with preserved vegetables, and house special chow mein.
The mu shu pork came first, and the waitress was kind enough to assemble them for us. These were fairly good, without anything feeling out of place. Without an ample enough amount of hoisin sauce they can be a bit bland, but luckily the waitress left extra sauce on the table.
Next up was the shrimp with glazed walnuts. Unfortunately there was a little too much mayonnaise on the shrimp, but not enough to obscure the naturally sweet flavors of the shrimp. The shrimp were plump, though, and there was a sizable amount. The walnuts could have been more glazed as well.
The calamari with garlic spicy salt fared slightly better. The dish wasn't bad, but I'm not a fan of the tempura-style batter. Still, the squid was cooked just right, and the garlic spicy salt had a little more punch in the flavor department than similar dishes at other restaurants.
I was very disappointed in the chow mein, which was bland. There also seemed to be too much starch in the gravy, which was particularly noticeable when I scooped a chow mein pancake into the take-out box.
The surprise of the meal turned out to be the shredded pork with preserved vegetables. Out of all the dishes, this one seemed to have the most fully-realized identity. The textures were varied, with crunchy strips of bamboo shoot and wood ear mushroom mixed with tender pieces of pork and onions. The flavors were sharp and bold, unlike many of the other dishes which seemed sloppy and undefined.
Overall I would say that I was underwhelmed by the meal. I did see a number of dishes being eaten by other patrons that looked appetizing, though, so chances are I will be back to give JR Bistro another shot.
Some other notes on JR Bistro:
- They didn't serve me ketchup and mustard like some other places I know, so that's a plus.
- When the wait staff did get around to helping us, they were very friendly, which is quite a bit different from some of the other Chinese restaurants I've been to.
JR Bistro
750 N. Hill St. #F
Los Angeles, CA 90012
(213) 620-0838
From all appearances, the interior of JR Bistro resembles a Hong Kong cafe, with a couple of big screen TVs on the walls. However the cuisine is typical of what you would find in most Chinatown restaurants. It took a while for the wait staff to take our order, and they looked undermanned but it could have been because it was a Sunday evening.
We ordered five dishes: mu shu pork, shrimp with glazed walnuts, calamari with garlic spicy salt, shredded pork with preserved vegetables, and house special chow mein.
The mu shu pork came first, and the waitress was kind enough to assemble them for us. These were fairly good, without anything feeling out of place. Without an ample enough amount of hoisin sauce they can be a bit bland, but luckily the waitress left extra sauce on the table.
Next up was the shrimp with glazed walnuts. Unfortunately there was a little too much mayonnaise on the shrimp, but not enough to obscure the naturally sweet flavors of the shrimp. The shrimp were plump, though, and there was a sizable amount. The walnuts could have been more glazed as well.
The calamari with garlic spicy salt fared slightly better. The dish wasn't bad, but I'm not a fan of the tempura-style batter. Still, the squid was cooked just right, and the garlic spicy salt had a little more punch in the flavor department than similar dishes at other restaurants.
I was very disappointed in the chow mein, which was bland. There also seemed to be too much starch in the gravy, which was particularly noticeable when I scooped a chow mein pancake into the take-out box.
The surprise of the meal turned out to be the shredded pork with preserved vegetables. Out of all the dishes, this one seemed to have the most fully-realized identity. The textures were varied, with crunchy strips of bamboo shoot and wood ear mushroom mixed with tender pieces of pork and onions. The flavors were sharp and bold, unlike many of the other dishes which seemed sloppy and undefined.
Overall I would say that I was underwhelmed by the meal. I did see a number of dishes being eaten by other patrons that looked appetizing, though, so chances are I will be back to give JR Bistro another shot.
Some other notes on JR Bistro:
- They didn't serve me ketchup and mustard like some other places I know, so that's a plus.
- When the wait staff did get around to helping us, they were very friendly, which is quite a bit different from some of the other Chinese restaurants I've been to.
JR Bistro
750 N. Hill St. #F
Los Angeles, CA 90012
(213) 620-0838
Learning New Languages
In an effort to expand my world, I've started a language program to learn Mandarin. The program is called "Ni Hao, Kai-lan."
With the help of Kai-lan, YeYe, Rintoo, Tolee, Hoho, and Lulu, Mandarin is both easy and fun to learn. The program also teaches additional life lessons, such as the value of family, friendship, and perseverance.
So far, after having viewed a handful of episodes, I have effectively doubled my Mandarin vocabulary. Here's a list of the vocabulary I have learned thus far:
grandpa (paternal) = yé yé
1, 2, 3 = yī, èr, sān
goodbye = zài jiàn
up = shàng
down = xià
blow = chuī
carrot = hú luó bo
While I feel that this language program is highly effective, they don't cover nearly as much Mandarin per episode as I would like. I also would have preferred to learn Cantonese, as that is the Chinese dialect predominantly spoken by my Chinese friends, but you go with what's available. Hopefully if I keep this up for a year, I might know about a hundred Mandarin words or phrases, although I don't know if I'll ever be able to properly ask for a carrot in Chinese.
For more information on "Ni Hao, Kai-lan" and how you can learn Mandarin, visit their site: Ni Hao, Kai-Lan
With the help of Kai-lan, YeYe, Rintoo, Tolee, Hoho, and Lulu, Mandarin is both easy and fun to learn. The program also teaches additional life lessons, such as the value of family, friendship, and perseverance.
So far, after having viewed a handful of episodes, I have effectively doubled my Mandarin vocabulary. Here's a list of the vocabulary I have learned thus far:
grandpa (paternal) = yé yé
1, 2, 3 = yī, èr, sān
goodbye = zài jiàn
up = shàng
down = xià
blow = chuī
carrot = hú luó bo
While I feel that this language program is highly effective, they don't cover nearly as much Mandarin per episode as I would like. I also would have preferred to learn Cantonese, as that is the Chinese dialect predominantly spoken by my Chinese friends, but you go with what's available. Hopefully if I keep this up for a year, I might know about a hundred Mandarin words or phrases, although I don't know if I'll ever be able to properly ask for a carrot in Chinese.
For more information on "Ni Hao, Kai-lan" and how you can learn Mandarin, visit their site: Ni Hao, Kai-Lan
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