Baron Davis is a Sunovabitch

During the winter of 1998, I was busy deciding what university to attend out of a small handful of choices. Out of the six options, I had only one front runner predicated on several minor but important factors: that the university have a top tier NCAA men's basketball team, that it house a first-rate video game arcade, that one of my parents attended but did not graduate from it, and that it had not accepted me into its engineering school. There was only one clear choice, and that was UCLA.

At the time, UCLA had one of the best arcades in the country, often serving as a testbed for the newest arcade games, so new that they were often imported from Japan.

They also had one of the best basketball programs in the nation, having won the NCAA title in 1995, and finishing first in the Pac-10 conference two years in a row and third the two years after that. And with their phenomenal point guard, Baron Davis, they looked poised to continue their success.

So it was that I committed to UCLA with expectations of watching Davis and the Bruins hoist a Pac-10 title banner or whatever they do at Pauley Pavilion, while spending many leisure hours at the arcade working on my lackluster Street Fighter skills.

Then, just as my senior year of high school was wrapping up, Baron Davis declared himself eligible for the NBA draft—and singlehandedly tanked the UCLA basketball program for the next six years, or pretty much my whole collegiate career.

Baron Davis first ended up on my radar as one of the nations top high school basketball prospects. He was a local kid, having attended Crossroads School in Santa Monica. I remember watching him play in the McDonald's All-American Game, and winning the dunk contest against an impressive Kenny Gregory (Whatever happened to that guy?). So I was excited when I heard that he was going to be attending UCLA in 1997. I was already heavily favoring UCLA, so knowing that one of the top point guards in the nation was going to be running the show for the Bruins got me excited.

But it proved to be nothing but disappointment and desolation thereafter. Jim Harrick, the most successful UCLA basketball coach since the legendary John Wooden, was fired by UCLA in 1996 as a result of questionable decisions as well as controversy surrounding the recruitment of Baron Davis. That brought in Steve Lavin who took over as head coach and in the few short years thereafter proved that he wasn't fit to be the head coach of a top basketball program.

And Davis bolted right as the Bruins seemed to be gelling. Following his departure were several lackluster recruiting classes, with the team slipping lower in the Pac-10 rankings with each subsequent year. The arcade also went through several renovations, closing down at some points, and shrinking in size and diversity.

Instead of walking around campus hearing the buzz about how well Davis played in last night's game, I heard about how Earl Watson knocked up my friend's friend. And I had classes with guys like Matt Barnes who spent most of class throwing crap at the people seated in front of him in the penultimate row.

So, for the next five years, embittered by the dissolution of potential basketball magickry, I spent as little time as I possibly could on campus. In short, Baron Davis ruined my college experience. Add to that that although he is a good player, he's almost never lived up to the hype. Also add to that that wherever Davis goes, misfortune almost certainly follows. So I say screw you, Baron Davis, you sunovabitch.

Why Doesn't Chris Kaman Have a Sneaker Deal?

Chris Kaman is the best true center currently playing basketball in the NBA's Western Conference. Don't believe me? The numbers don't lie.

Out of all Western Conference centers, he ranks first in points per game (18.4), first in points + rebounds + assists (29.2), third in double-doubles (28), fourth in rebounds per game (9.2, fifth if you count Tim Duncan as a center, which he isn't), and fifth in PER (18.67). He even made the all-star team for the first time in his career after initially being snubbed. And yet he doesn't have his own signature sneaker. Right now he's playing in the Nike Hypermaxes, but surely a player of this caliber deserves something more. After all, he's leading his team in points, rebounds, and blocked shots.

Since he's already playing in Nikes, perhaps they could throw him a bone and hook him up with his own signature line, something like the Nike Kamanizers. Imagine a full Zoom Air unit sitting on top of a heel-to-toe 360 Air Max bag, riding on top of Shox, with a synthetic Flywire/Torch/patent leather upper all decked out in the Clipper red, white, blue. It'd be as if his feet were encased in, and flying on clouds. Think how much better a player he'd be in his own sneaker line. Instead of just being one of the top Western Conference centers, he could be one of the best NBA centers. Or one of the best NBA players.

Maybe Adidas should add him to their already impressive big man lineup. He could join the likes of Tim Duncan, Kevin Garnett, Dwight Howard, and Michael Beasley with his own signature TS Supernatural Commanders. With the power of Pure Motion and Adiprene+ supporting him, Chris Kaman could be beasting the league even more.

Or why not bump him up to Jordan brand. Jordan brand has primarily appealed to athletic guards and forwards, but why not adorn one of elite centers of the league with the hallowed Jordan name? He could have the Air Kamans or the CK35s, a pair of fashionable yet rugged basketball shoes that look as good on the court as they do off.

Basically, Chris Kaman is a playa, and he should look like one, too. A player this good shouldn't be playing in normal, off-the-shelf basketball shoes, and at the very least he should have his own PEs. The bottom line is Chris Kaman is a baller so get this dude a sneaker deal.

Top Ten Basketball Players Who Sported Box Cuts, Flat Tops, or Box Fros

1. Shawn Kemp
2. Grant Hill
3. Chris Webber
4. Dominique Wilkins
5. Gary Payton
6. Scottie Pippen
7. Chris Mullin
8. Mark Jackson
9. Kendall Gill
10. Bryant Reeves

Honorable Mention: Robert Pack, Gerald Wilkins

Never try to dunk over a trash can on a 10' rim yelling "Chambers" in front of your friends if you're 5'6", Asian, and have never dunked before

To attempt to do so is a recipe for disaster. Seriously. Don't try this. I can't stress that enough.

For if Tom Chambers is the best dunking role model you can think of, you're in big trouble. Sure, he had the one big dunk, but that was on 6'1" Mark Jackson. Plus Tom Chambers is like a 6'10" white dude. There are probably a hundred better players/dunkers than Tom Chambers. Understandably to invoke the name of Jordan or Nique perhaps conveys too lofty an expectation, but there are plenty of better than average players who were solid dunkers--Latrell Sprewell, Michael Finley, and Kevin Johnson to name a few.

So before you go and make yourself look foolish, try picking a better dunking role model's name to call out. Trust me. You'll thank me later.

Chicago Bulls at the LA Clippers 10/28/95 preseason

I finished pulling the highlights from my first game of this project. While watching the game I had a few observations, as well as remembered some things.

Remembered:
- When I first re-watched all these games, I got watching them down to 1 1/2 hours per game. The average NBA broadcast is 2 1/2 hours.
- How horrible the Clippers were then even with some talented young players. They're much better now.

New observations:
- I was surprised to hear in the pre-game show that Jordan thought they could win 70 games that season. Remember, this was even before the regular season began.
- The 3-point line was so much closer.
- I kind of miss the ever present scoreboard that is now present in all broadcast games, but it is nice being able to see more of what's happening on the floor.

And by the way, the Bulls won 116-94. No surprise there (although they had lost to that same Clipper team the night before).

Re-watching the Bulls

Years ago, when I was in high school, I was fanatical about the Chicago Bulls. Fanatical. I tried to tape almost every broadcast game from the 95/96 season through 97/98. This was in the days before League Pass, when the internet meant AOL and Compuserve, and it took forever to download a picture (of puppies of course). It took dedication to be a super fan.

So recently I was watching an old mixtape I had made of Bulls highlights from the 95/96 regular season. That was the season the Bulls led by Phil Jackson, Michael Jordan, Scottie Pippen, Dennis Rodman, and Toni Kukoc won 72 regular season games (of 82) en route to their first championship since Jordan had retired. I recorded it on VHS, and I had used two non-SVHS VCRs to dub the footage over the course of a couple days. Of course that followed the several weeks I had taken to rewatch every game and had taken copious notes to help narrow down the choice highlights. It was a labor of love at the time. I still watch basketball but not on the level that I did for those three years. That was the first, last, and only professional sports team that I will ever love so much barring the possibility that I have a child who also grows up to be a professional athlete. Although in that case I probably still won't love his or her team that much.

After watching the tape I had a few thoughts: at least three of the non-Bulls players on the tape have since passed away (Bobby Phills, Bison Dele, Malik Sealy), very few players are left in the league from that year, and how easy it looked when the Bulls scored. It also got me thinking--perhaps I should re-edit the video.

I had kept most of the tapes from back then. I have a video transfer device, an editing program as well as the expertise to go along with all that. I even have an SVHS VCR with a flying head that should make things easier this time around. I have the tools and the resources, so what's to stop me? So off I go then, re-watching those magical seasons. I hope to check back in now and then with observations about the experience. It sure is going to be a pleasure seeing basketball played by the greatest again.