Cage Watch

Cage Movie #53: Vampire's Kiss

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #52: Fire Birds

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #51: Drive Angry

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #50: The Boy in Blue

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #49: Zandalee

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #48: Amos & Andrew

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #47: Trapped in Paradise

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #46: Astro Boy

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #45: Honeymoon in Vegas

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #44: Valley Girl

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #43: The Sorcerer's Apprentice

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #42: World Trade Center

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #41: Deadfall

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #40: Snake Eyes

Cage Watch

Cage Movie #39: Knowing

Cage Watch

There's something I have to admit. For years, I was a closet Nicolas Cage fan. I used to make fun of him, particularly his role in "The Rock," which is one of my favorite movies. It's not so much that he's a bad actor, because he's not, but it's largely because of his acting decisions. And the commentary he provided on "The Rock." For years I ridiculed him, but I must openly admit that I, MidnightHunnyRun, am a Cage-a-phile.

My life's goal is to watch every movie he's ever made—and there's a lot. To date, he's performed in 59 movies, with another four currently finishing up production. Out of those 59, I've watched 38. So, in what is my continuing year-long Cage-a-thon, I'll be keeping count on my blog of what new Nicolas Cage movie is in my DVD player. Here's today's Cage Watch movie, followed by a list of all the other Cage movies I've seen. And lest anybody tell me about Cage-flix, I already know about it, but have already manually added every remaining Cage movie to my queue. God bless that man.

Cage Movie #38: National Treasure: Book of Secrets

Kick-Ass (2010)
Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call of New Orleans (2009)
G-Force (2009)
Bangkok Dangerous (2008)
Next (2007)
Grindhouse (2007)
Ghost Rider (2007)
The Wicker Man (2006)
The Ant Bully (2006)
The Weather Man (2005)
Lord of War (2005)
National Treasure (2004)
Matchstick Men (2003)
Adaptation (2002)
Sonny (2002)
Windtalkers (2002)
Captain Corelli's Mandolin (2001)
The Family Man (2000)
Gone in Sixty Seconds (2000)
Bringing Out the Dead (1999)
8MM (1999)
City of Angels (1998)
Face/Off (1997)
Con Air (1997)
The Rock (1996)
Leaving Las Vegas (1995)
Kiss of Death (1995)
It Could Happen to You (1994)
Guarding Tess (1994)
Red Rock West (1993)
Wild at Heart (1990)
Moonstruck (1987)
Raising Arizona (1987)
Peggy Sue Got Married (1986)
Birdy (1984)
Rumble Fish (1983)
Fast Times at Ridgemont High (1982)

Never Try to Catch Up on "Lost" By Reading Full Episode Recaps While Watching a David Lynch Movie

First of all, doing something like that is somewhat Lynchian in theory, and also illogical. Reading about "Lost" is similar to what I've heard about studying philosophy: it's like trying to scratch an itch on your foot through your shoe. And trying to follow any Lynch movie, let alone "Wild at Heart," is like trying to make heads or tails about a frog who can sing and fly, but who is really a rabbit that can neither sing nor fly, but instead can cook pancakes.

In the end, knowing "Lost" and not knowing "Lost" make only a slight bit of difference in understanding how all the characters end up together in the end. And a David Lynch movie will be a David Lynch movie regardless of whether you pay full attention or not. In both, you will have constant WTF moments.

So in that sense, reading about "Lost" while watching a David Lynch movie is simply to resign yourself to the understanding that you definitely will not get either. It's not the worst thing you can do in the world, but it is a lot like waisting time in a bar, staring into space trying to understand the inner workings of the Wurlitzer in the corner hidden behind the 7-foot tall goo goo monster that's just minding it's business. Oh, plus the bar is really a swap meet.

Top Ten Celebrities Whose Autographs I Would Like and On What

1. Nicolas Cage - "The Wicker Man" or "The Rock" DVD
2. Michael Jordan - basketball card
3. Tom Hanks - "You've Got Mail" DVD
4. Meg Ryan - "You've Got Mail" DVD
5. Alexis Stewart (Martha Stewart's daughter) - anything
6. Bruce Willis - "Die Hard" or "Hudson Hawk" DVD
7. Arnold Schwarzenegger - "Kindergarten Cop" DVD
8. Tony Leung - "Chungking Express" blu-ray
9. Kurt Russell - "Big Trouble in Little China" DVD
10. Laura Linney - "Congo" DVD

2010 Quick Movie Recap

I feel that people are under the impression that I only watch bad movies (or shitty movies) since that's all I write about. I don't. And I don't simply review every bad movie I see. I'm actually quite selective in the ones I post about. I watch a ton of movies—nearly a movie a day—and not all of them are bad. The majority of movies I watch I feel lukewarm about, like "Ray" or "Good Will Hunting." I watch plenty of good movies, and some of them I even like. Here's a list for some of the better movies I've seen so far this year, as well as a list for some of the worst. You might notice some trends.

The Best
"All the President's Men" - There's more integrity in this than just journalistic integrity.
"Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans" - Nicolas Cage doing what Nicolas Cage does best—acting like a crazy sumbitch.
"Broadcast News" - Albert Brooks and Holly Hunter shine in this behind the scenes look at a love triangle at a news production studio.
"Death of a Salesman" - Dustin Hoffman in the performance of a lifetime as Willie Loman.
"Housesitter" - Standard romantic comedy fare, but I'm a sucker for Steve Martin and Goldie Hawn.
"Kramer vs. Kramer" - Two actors at the tops of their games.
"Last Chance Harvey" - A simple, sometimes plodding romance, but the actors are just so winning.
"The Long Goodbye" - A hypnotic, modern take on Philip Marlowe.
"The Natural" - Feel-good sports movie.
"Parenthood" - Funny and touching with a strong dramatic acting turn from Steve Martin.
"Raising Arizona" - Crazy Nicolas Cage and cute-as-a-button Holly Hunter in one of the Coen Brothers' classic comedies.
"The Spanish Prisoner" - A clever mystery box movie marred by one particularly poor actress who just happened to be the director's wife.
"Stripes"- Classic Bill Murray. He's 10 and 1.
"World's Greatest Dad" - A surprisingly touching dark comedy directed by Bobcat Goldthwait. Yes, that Bobcat Goldthwait.

The Worst
"9 Songs" - Like watching a porno where music concert footage is constantly interrupting the action. I'd rather watch real porn, because at least they have plots.
"The Adventures of Pluto Nash" - Garbage. I'd rather meet Dave.
"Bangkok Dangerous" - Neither good nor bad, which is not what I hope for in a Nicolas Cage movie.
"Confessions of a Shopaholic" - I wished she would have kept them to herself.
"Downloading Nancy" - It's supposed to be an insightful look at people's (in)abilities to relate to each other. I guess it worked, because in the end I couldn't care less what happened to the characters.
"The Girlfriend Experience" - Like watching real life slowly eat your soul.
"Ishtar" - This was actually pretty funny, and I might review it in the future if I can only get that first song out of my head.
"Love And Other Disasters" - I think Britney Murphy was supposed to be British in this, but I'm not sure. Too bad she didn't die before making this one.
"Meet Dave" - My mom recommended this to me. Now I second guess every movie she suggests.
"P2" - This was pretty, damn hilarious. I loved the part when the guy rammed his car into the other guy multiple times, spilling his guts.
"The Princess of Nebraska" - See "The Girlfriend Experience."
"Serendipity" - I wanted to kill Kate Beckinsale in this movie, and I like Kate Beckinsale.
Shortcut to Happiness - Poor Alec Baldwin, he directed this remake of "The Devil and Daniel Webster." I tried to find the shitty in this, but couldn't. It's just bad.
"Sugar and Spice" - Nothing nice about this one.
"Paul Blart: Mall Cop" - It didn't look good from the previews, and guess what? It wasn't.
"The Wannabes" - I only watched this because Isla Fisher is in it. Surprise, it's Australian. And it's crap.
"Year One" - Why Harold Ramis?! You've brought us "Caddyshack," "National Lampoon's Vacation," and "Groundhog Day." Why do you hate us now?

My Top Twenty Movie Quotes

I have way more than twenty, but I'll start with this lot. Some of these I repeat all the time. I won't mention where they're from so you can have fun guessing. For Sister C, only list the movie title initials since you have an unfair advantage. Also, you can add the correct response since some of these have equally good follow-up answers.

1. But how in the name of Zeus' BUTTHOLE! ... did you get out of your cell? I only ask because in our current situation, well, it could prove to be useful information. MAYBE!
2. I wanted it to be you. I wanted it to be you so badly.
3. Look at that subtle off-white coloring. The tasteful thickness of it. Oh my God, it even has a watermark!
4. It's Marvin - your cousin, Marvin BERRY. You know that new sound you're looking for? Well, listen to this.
5. You. You are still dangerous. You can be my wingman anytime.
6. Please, God. No. You're one of them, aren't you?
7. Somebody's gotta go back and get a shitload of dimes.
8. We're gonna need a bigger boat.
9. Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again.
10. Zey dezerve to be 'ere mo zan we.
11. Littering and ... littering and ... littering and smokin' the reefer.
12. This is all his fault! He tricked me into going this way, but he'll do no better.
13. I live my life a quarter mile at a time.
14. And Leon's getting larger.
15. Phil? Phil Connors? I thought it was you!
16. Sir, you are talking to a nigger!
17. I have a meeting in ... men's room.
18. Say it! Say it! He was my boyfriend!
19. They're coming to get you, Barbara.
20. You son of a bitch, you left the bodies and you only moved the head stones. You only moved the head stones. Why? Why?